Bible Study Interim Class

Wow, what an evening last night. Since we had just wrapped up the book of Jude and had only two weeks before the end of our 2009 Bible Study schedule (we follow the visitation schedule which ends the week of Thanksgiving and resumes the first week of January), we had one week to discuss one topic.

Our topic was forgiveness.

What a broad topic, but it is one that I am sure was God ordered especially with the recent events in our church.

What did I learn last night? I learned that many times the problems others are going through could have been prevented if I had been on my knees, if I had fasted, and maybe if I had spoken up earlier. This is what God showed me to declare to the class with the vivid illustration of the recent events.

Do you know someone who has truly messed up? Someone who is misguided? Someone who has lost their way? Perhaps this person is only reacting out of fear.

If we are to become mature Christians, we need to see past the hurt in the offender, to the need. We have no choice in this. If we claim the name of Jesus, we are to do as He did, and what He did is recorded in Luke 23:34:


“Then said Jesus, ‘
Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.’
And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.”

We discussed several bible verses on Forgiveness and some very wise quotes:  Here is the list if you would like to read them.


Forgiveness in the Bible

 

Proverbs 20:22
Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the LORD, and he will deliver you.
Micah 7:18-19
Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.
Matthew 5:24
Leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.
Matthew 5:44-45
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
Matthew 6:9-15
This, then, is how you should pray: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Matthew 18:21-35
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”
Matthew 26:28
This is my blood of the[a] covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.
Mark 2:5

When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, “Son, your sins are forgiven.”
Mark 11:25
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
Luke 6:35-38;42
But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
Luke 7:47-48
Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.” Then Jesus said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”
Luke 23:34
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.
Luke 24:46-47
He told them, “This is what is written: The Christ will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance and forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.
John 20:22-23
And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. 23If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.”
Acts 2:38
Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.
Acts 10:43
All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”
Acts 26:17-18
I will rescue you from your own people and from the Gentiles. I am sending you to them 18to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.’
Ephesians 1:7
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace
Colossians 1:13
For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves,
Colossians 3:13
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Hebrews 6:1-3
Therefore let us leave the elementary teachings about Christ and go on to maturity, not laying again the foundation of repentance from acts that lead to death, and of faith in God, instruction about baptisms, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment. And God permitting, we will do so.
Hebrews 10:16-23
This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.”Then he adds: “Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more.”And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin. Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.
James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
1 John 1:7
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[a] sin.
1 John 1:9-10
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.


Forgiveness Quotes

  • Forgiveness is me giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me.
  • Forgiveness is choosing to love. It is the first skill of self-giving love.
  • The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
  • To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you.
  • Forgiveness means that you’ve decided not to let it keep festering inside even if it only comes up once in awhile.
  • Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.
  • Resentment is like a glass of poison that a man drinks; then he sits down and waits for his enemy to die.
  • Know all and you will pardon all.–Thomas Kempis
  • We are all full of weakness and errors; let us mutually pardon each other our follies.–Voltaire
  • A mature Christian has capacity to absorb the offenses and weaknesses of others, not just demand they perform up to the code of ideals.–Stephen Crosby
  • Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.–Cherie Carter-Scott
  • He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.–George Herbert
  • A Christian will find it cheaper to pardon than to resent. Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, and the waste of spirit.–Hannah More
  • I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive. Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note–torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one.– Henry Ward Beecher
  • Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting.–William A. Ward
  • You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.–Lewis B. Smedes
  • What we forgive too freely doesn’t stay forgiven.–Mignon McLaughlin
  • It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.–William Blake
  • It is very easy to forgive others their mistakes; it takes more grit and gumption to forgive them for having witnessed your own.–Jessamyn West
  • Wrongs are often forgiven, but contempt never is. Our pride remembers it forever.–Lord Chesterfield
  • Forgiveness is accepting God’s sovereign use of people and situations to strip you of self importance, and humiliate your self love.–Martha Kilpatrick
  • Without deep humility, true forgiveness is impossible…and will never happen.–Martha Kilpatrick
  • Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heal that has crushed it.–Mark Twain
  • Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge, and dares forgive an injury.–E. H. Chapin
  • Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?– Abraham Lincoln
  • There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.– Josh Billings
  • Humanity is never so beautiful as when praying for forgiveness, or else forgiving another.–Jean Paul Richter
  • The glory of Christianity is to conquer by forgiveness.–William Blake
  • Yes, this is what good is: to forgive evil. There is no other good.–Antonio Porchia
  • A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.–Robert Quillen
  • Forgiveness is the final form of love.–Reinhold Niebuhr
  • One forgives to the degree that one loves.–Francois de La Rochefoucauld
  • ‘Tis the most tender part of love, each other to forgive.–John Sheffield
  • Never forget the three powerful resources you always have available to you: love, prayer, and forgiveness.–H. Jackson Brown
  • We are all on a life long journey and the core of its meaning, the terrible demand of its centrality is forgiving and being forgiven. –Martha Kilpatrick
  • Forgiveness is the giving, and so the receiving, of life.–George MacDonald
  • When I become bitter or unforgiving toward others, I’m assuming that the sins of others are more serious than my sins against God.  The cross transforms my perspective.  Through the cross I realize that no sin committed against me will ever be as serious as the innumerable sins I’ve committed against God.  When we understand how much God has forgiven us, it’s not difficult to forgive others.–C.J. Mahaney
  • We need not climb up into heaven to see whether our sins are forgiven:  let us look into our hearts, and see if we can forgive others.  If we can, we need not doubt but God as forgiven us.– Thomas Watson
  • Forgiveness is not that stripe which says, “I will forgive, but not forget.” It is not to bury the hatchet with the handle sticking out of the ground, so you can grasp it the minute you want it.– D.L. Moody
  • Christians are the most forgiven people in the world.  Therefore, we should be the most forgiving people in the world.–Ken Sande

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Book Review: I Run to the Hills: Reflections on the Christian Journey by C. Maggie Woychik

I Run To The Hills Eloquence, wisdom and reflection is found throughout this exceptional book.

Maggie Woychik’s I Run to the Hills: Reflections on the Christian Journey is as it states in the title a journey through the thoughts and ponderings of a christian.

The writing style is quite unlike what I am accustomed to and very refreshing.

Inspiring vivid mental imagery sometimes by poem, sometimes by short essay, the reader becomes lost in the thought of the concepts, not merely the story.

Much of the book provokes reflective response in the reader. Though it is a short book, it takes some time to absorb.  I pondered such thoughts as:

  • “Musing involves our innate sense of inspiration or genius.  Today, musing (thinking deeply at at length for a purpose of discovery) is an almost forgotten concept. Time is too scarce in our hustle and bustle society to allow for questionable extravagances, like musing.”
  • “Genuine love adores from a distance, content to watch and patiently wait. But, idolatry worships and kisses the fetish, intent on immediate gratification.”
  • “Is it really possible to live on the brink of wonderment?”

This is indeed a book conceived and experienced by many a quiet time in deep reflection.

Those who have such times with their Lord will enjoy and identify with the emotions and thoughts described in this book. Quite an enjoyable book to read.  Be ready to ponder and perhaps seek out some of the concepts mentioned.

About the Author
Maggie Woychik is a freelance writer and former homeschooling mom of 10 years, wife of 27 years, and mother of a 20 year old son, and lives on a small acreage in the Midwest with their sheep and chickens, and lots to keep them busy!

# Paperback: 136 pages
# Publisher: Port Yonder Press (September 23, 2009)
# Language: English
# ISBN-10: 0984169407
# ISBN-13: 978-0984169405

Disclaimer:  I am thankful that Maggie Woychik offered a copy of this book to me for review free of charge which has now been donated to the library of Westwood Baptist Church.

Friday Funnies: Medical Definitions for Ordinary Folks

Friday Funies - Definitions for EverydayCould you use a laugh? Is it time for a coffee break?  Did you know that God says that laughing is as beneficial to you as a prescription from your doctor? Here are a few medical definitions for us ordinary folks that should make you laugh out loud, well – at least smile.

Laughter is good medicine!

 


 

“A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance
- Proverbs 15:13 -

“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine”
- Proverbs 17:22 -

He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting.
- Job 8:21 -

 


Benign:  What you be after you be eight.

Artery:  The study of paintings.

Bacteria:  Back door to cafeteria.

Barium:  What doctors do when patients die.

Cesarean Section: .A neighborhood in Rome.

Catscan:  Searching for kitty.

Cauterize:  Made eye contact with her.

Colic:  A sheep dog.

Coma:  A punctuation mark.

D & C: Where Washington is.

Dilate: To live long.

Enema: Not a friend.

Eyedropper:  A clumsy ophthalmologist.

Fester:  Quicker than someone else.

Fibula:  A small lie.

G. I. Series:  World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail:  What you hang your coat on.

Labor Pain:  Getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff:  A Doctor’s cane.

Morbid:  A higher offer than I  bid.

Nitrates:  Cheaper than day.

Node:  Was aware of.

Outpatient:  A person who has fainted.

Pelvis:  Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative:  A letter carrier.

Recovery Room:  Place to do upholstery.

Secretion:  Hiding something.

Seizure:  Roman emperor.

Tablet:  A small table.

Terminal Illness:  Getting sick at the airport.

Tumor:  More than one.

Urine:  Opposite of you’re out.

Varicose:  Nearby, close by.

Vein:  Conceited

Jude 17-25

Monday, November 2nd, we continued our study in the Book of Jude covering verses 17-25. These are the ‘how to’ verses of Jude instructing us in what to do as we contend for the faith.

17But, beloved, remember ye the words which were spoken before of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ; 18How that they told you there should be mockers in the last time, who should walk after their own ungodly lusts. 19These be they who separate themselves, sensual, having not the Spirit.

20But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost, 21Keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.

22And of some have compassion, making a difference:  23And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.

24Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy, 25To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen.

jude

Reading these verses, several key words were brought out to me. These are the how to verses, first setting the standard for how to contend and then making us aware of the various ways He will ask us to contend with other believers who err in the faith.

We are to build
We cannot correct another unless we first know what it is we are contending for. We are to build ourselves up in our most holy faith.  Flying blindly into defensive mode would benefit no one, lest of all God.  How do we build ourselves in faith?  We study, we read, we mediate, we contemplate, we ponder all the wonderful stories of faith in the Word of God.  Once we have these great faith stories floating in our minds, we move on to the second step.

We are to pray
Reading of the great cloud of witnesses whose lives are recounted in the many pages of the bible, we begin to ask the question, why? We begin to pray. God’s Word never contradicts. In order to learn the reasons God does what He does, we ask. And He tells us.  We can then know what is His will.

We are to keep ourselves
First we learn the story. Then we learn why God acted or reacted in a given way. And finally, we begin to keep ourselves in His love. We begin to notice in ourselves the very behavior we’ve read in the lives of those in the bible. We begin to discipline our life in accordance with the love of God.

We are to look for mercy
Now we find that if we are to contend with another on the issue of faith, we must have mercy. God was patient with us in our ignorance of Him and His Word. We must be merciful and patient with others as we attempt to contend against those that would subvert His Word.

Now comes the options. God tells us of the types of folks we will encounter and how he would have us react.

Some need compassion
These are the people who sincerely believe in what they are striving for, even though it is not the will of God. These people need compassion. They need understanding and perhaps some discipleship.

Still others may need a jolt
There are times when we may need to act quickly, explaining decisively to another of an error.  These are the times when God would have us hate the sin and love the sinner.  Their garments are spotted from the ways of the world.  To a believer, one who truly belongs to Jesus, a quick jolt with the Word of God may be all it takes to keep them from making a terrible mistake.

In the book of Jude, I’ve found that God tells us that there are those that would infiltrate our churches with false doctrine.  They are to be met immediately with the Word of God and those that remain are those we discussed tonight. Confused and deceived believers need others who are strong in faith, prayed up, kept and disciplined, looking for mercy – ready to offer compassion or a sudden jolt of Truth when necessary.

Jesus…No Greater Love, by Bruce Marchiano

Guest post by Bruce Marchiano, producer of Jesus…No Greater Love

The truth of the gospel never changes. But Christianity has many faces. They reflect the customs and cultures and the beautiful diversity of the global church. They are lined with the wisdom of age and vibrant with the passion of youth. One gospel for all the world…but how will we deliver it in a way that reaches the whole world? How will we reach the next generation?

Young Christians today are more like St. Francis of Assisi than a circuit riding preacher. “Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary, use words.”

This is a generation focused on being the hands and feet of Christ and meeting the physical needs of those in both the local and global community. They are building houses, planting gardens, taking food and clothes to the poor and helping the widows and orphans… and then they are sharing the gospel. And they are using technology like never before. They communicate the message through audio, film, video and the internet, and they strive for excellence within those mediums. They must. This is how they will reach their generation for Christ.

I share their passion. In the film, The Gospel According to Matthew, we were able to capture the heart of Christ that is so often missing in Christian films, but the quality of the film making was constrained by an $800,000 budget. Now we are inspiring a movement that will bring Jesus to film in a version that literally leaps off the screen and into the hearts of viewers.

Jesus…No Greater Love will be a word for word, verse by verse film adaption of the Gospel according to John. The gospel is the power of God unto salvation. That’s really our concept, that the gospel would go out in the power of the film medium, unaltered by any human script writer.

The budget for a typical Hollywood production is $100-110 million. Actors’ salaries account for much of that cost. Because the new Jesus movie will be not be paying big name actors, our team believes we can produce a world class, state-of-the-art film incorporating the latest cutting-edge technology for just $45 million. The production will be shot on location in Jerusalem and shot digitally using CGI backgrounds and a green screen stage, providing unlimited potential for sharing the gospel for generations to come.

We are inviting people from all nations and all generations to join this movement to bring the gospel to all people. A movement made of 4.5 million people contributing a tax deductible donation of $10 each would fund the cost of the film. The Gospel belongs to everyone, and the new Jesus movie will be produced expressly so it can be accessed by everyone, no matter their financial situation. Our team’s vision is to see the film translated into as many languages as possible and supplied to mission organizations and churches all over the world.

You can become a part of the movement to reach the next generation. Please help us spread the word to your friends and family. If you would like to make a donation, you can do so at http://www.newjesusmovie.com./

Also, you can keep up with our progress by visiting any of these links:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce Marchiano is an actor, author, international speaker, and the founder of Marchiano Ministries, a non-profit organization reaching out to people both spiritually and practically in the USA and across the world. He is best known for his joyful, passionate portrayal of Jesus in the film, The Gospel According to Matthew.

Christians, Blood, Halloween and Bars

BloodMatt and I went to our local ‘Blood Connection’ office and gave blood last night. I highly recommend it.  Call me crazy, but there is something abstractly beautiful about Christians who donate blood.

On the way home, we noticed all the ‘Haunted Houses’ along the way.  Lights flashing everywhere, some were just for Halloween and some were blue lights outside bars.

We began to discuss how similar these two things were.  Both are dark, both are scary, both take your hard earned money and give you grief and fear in return. This is so very sad, but true.  It has been said that “If the wages of sin were paid immediately, it would be much less popular.”

I wondered why God does not immediately punish sin.  My only conclusion is that He is our merciful, long suffering God. So, for this Halloween, I offering some great words and some additional resources from great minds on the subject of Halloween.

What God said…

  1. “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.” – Hosea 4:6
  2. “…what communion hath light with darkness?” – II Corinthians 6:14b
  3. “The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light.” - Romans 13:12
  4. “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” – Ephesians 6:12
  5. “Ye cannot drink the cup of the Lord, and the cup of devils: ye cannot be partakers of the Lord’s table, and of the table of devils.”  – I Corinthians 10:21

What other folks have said…

Hold on, man.  We don’t go anywhere with “scary,” “spooky,” “haunted,” or “forbidden” in the title.
-From Scooby-Doo

Clothes make a statement.  Costumes tell a story.
-Mason Cooley

If a man harbors any sort of fear, it makes him landlord to a ghost.
- Lloyd Douglas

To suffering there is a limit; to fearing, none.
-Sir Francis Bacon,

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing Material places.
- Emily Dickinson

What other folks have written…

Halloween Origins and Customs
- The Jeremiah Project

Hallowing Halloween
- Christianity Today

Christians and Halloween
- Grace to You

 

 

Friday Funnies: Definitions for Ordinary Folks

Friday Funies - Definitions for EverydayCould you use a laugh? Is it time for a coffee break?  Did you know that God says that laughing is as beneficial to you as a prescription from your doctor? Here are a few definitions for us ordinary folks that should make you laugh out loud, well – at least smile.

Laughter is good medicine!

 


“A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance
- Proverbs 15:13 -

“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine”
- Proverbs 17:22 -

He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting.
- Job 8:21 -


ABASH: A high school graduation party.

ABDICATE: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

ACCOUNT: A Countess’s husband.

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

ANTIQUE: An item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of, and you’re buying again.

ARBITRATOR:  A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at Burger King.

AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tries to do.

BALDERDASH: A rapidly receding hairline.

BARIUM: What we do to most people when they die.

BATHROOM: A room used by the entire family, believed by all except Mom to be self-cleaning.

BEAUTY PARLOR: Places where women curl up and dye.

CANTALOUPE: Gotta get married in a church.

CAR SICKNESS: The feeling you get when the car payment is due.

CATALOGS: Rails used to build cow fences.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

CLASSIC: A book which people praise, but do not read.

CLOTHES DRYER: An appliance designed to eat socks.

COLLEGE: The four year period when parents are permitted access to the telephone.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

COMPROMISE: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

CONFERENCE: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

CONTROL:  A short, ugly inmate.

COURTESY: The art of yawning with your mouth closed.

DERANGE: Where de buffalo roam.

DICTIONARY: A place where success comes before work.

DOCTOR: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

EMERGENCY NUMBERS: Police station, Fire Department and Places that deliver.

Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

EYEDROPPER:  A clumsy ophthalmologist.

EXPERIENCE: The name men give to their mistakes.

FABLE: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

FAMILY PLANNING: the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.

FANCY RESTAURANT: One that serves cold soup on purpose.

FATHER: A banker provided by nature.

FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when the baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.

FLABBERGASTED: Appalled over how much weight you have gained.

FULL NAME: What you call your child when you’re mad at him/her.

GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

GRANDMOTHER: A baby-sitter who doesn’t hang around the refrigerator.

GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.

GROCERY LIST: What you spend half an hour writing, and then forget to take with you to the store.

GUM: Adhesive for the hair.

HAIR DRESSER: Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See “Magician.”

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

HEROES:  What a guy in a boat does.

HINDSIGHT: What one experiences from changing too many diapers.

HORS D’OEUVRES: A sandwich cut into 20 pieces.

IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

INDEPENDENT:  How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

KISSING: A means of getting two people so close together that they can’t see anything wrong with each other.

MISER: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

MISTY:  How golfers create divots.

MYTH: A female moth.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

OW:  The first word spoken by children with older siblings.

OYSTER: A person who sprinkles their conversation with Yiddish expressions.

PARADOX:  Two physicians.

POLITICIAN: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

POLYGON: A dead parrot.

PRENATAL: When your life was still somewhat your own.

PRIMATE:  Removing your husband from in front of the TV.

PROFESSOR: Someone who talks in someone else’s sleep.

PUDDLE:  A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

QUIET: A state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

REFRIGERATOR: Combination art gallery and air-conditioner for the kitchen.

RELIEF: What trees do in the spring.

RUBBERNECK:  What you do to relax your wife.

SEAMSTRESS:  Describes 250 pounds in a size 6.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SELFISH: What the owner of a seafood store does.

SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours.

SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

SMILE: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

SPOILED ROTTEN: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma.

STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.

SUDAFED:  Brought litigation against a government official.

TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

TWO-MINUTE WARNING: When the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.

VEGETARIAN: Old Indian word for bad hunter.

YAWN: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.

ZUCCHINI: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.

Book Review & Giveaway – Sacred Friendships: Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith by Robert W. Kellemen, PH.D and Susan M. Ellis

Sacred Friendship

Would you be interested in the history of fifty history changing women? These are women of character, fortitude and great faith? Would you learn about these women who shaped and changed the lives of others?

Sacred Friendships – Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith by Robert W. Kellemen, PH.D and Susan M. Ellis is the place to begin. Thoroughly researched and presented with admiration,  you’ll find great inspiration here.

As a Bible Study leader, I was amazed at the large  list of influential, but often unnoticed, women of great faith.As a woman, I identified with many of the struggles these women faced both as a result of the culture of their day and their own  inner conflict.

Reading of these women’s statements from their diaries, journals and other writings as well as  statements made about them by their contemporaries, I was challenged and made aware of these ‘great cloud of witnesses.’

These are the daughters, mothers, wives, and friends of some of those whose names you certainly would remember. Names such as Spurgeon, Edwards, and  Wesley – all great men of faith.  But the reader also discovers many women whose names and stories you might not encounter unless discovered in reference to another.  In this book, these unnoticed women of history are profiled with a focus on the spiritual direction their lives revealed.

It is sage advice that a woman was created to inspire and influence others. As you read the stories of these women, you will find this is the common thread among them. They inspired, comforted and encouraged. They also suffered, remained steadfast, and revealed admirable personality traits as they each pursued their walk with God.

Profiles include Vibia Perpetua, Susannah Wesley, Terea of Avila, and Betsie Ten Boom.  Quite a large list follows, too many to list here. This is a reference book for any women’s ministry leader. I recommend this book highly and have donated my reference copy to my church library.

I am honored to be included in the blog tour for the release of this book and thank Bob Kellemen and Susan Ellis for offering to include me.

Robert W. Kellemen
My passion is to equip people to change lives with Christ’s changeless truth through comprehensive, compassionate, culturally-informed biblical counseling and spiritual formation. That’s why I authored Soul Physicians, Spiritual Friends, Beyond the Suffering, and Sacred Friendships. That’s why I Chair the MA in Christian Counseling and Discipleship Department at Capital Bible Seminary.

Susan M. Ellis
Susan M. Ellis, M.A. is an adjunct professor and women’s mentor for the M.A. in Christian Counseling and Discipleship Department at Capital Bible Seminary. In these roles she is on the cutting edge of research and development in women’s ministry, and is an expert mentor, training women in the art of soul care and spiritual direction.

Additional Resources
Sample Chapter – Read Chapter 10 of Sacred Friendships
Recommendations - Read endorsements for Sacred Friendships
Source Information – For Reviewers, Educators, or Media Representatives

692645: Sacred Friendships - Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith Sacred Friendships – Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith

By Robert W Kellemen & Susan M Ellis / B M H Books

# Paperback: 296 pages
# Publisher: BMH Books; 1st edition (September 11, 2009)
# Language: English
# ISBN-10: 0884692647
# ISBN-13: 978-0884692645


- Book Giveaway -

Would you like to win a free autographed copy of Sacred Friendships – Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith?  Read the rules below and enter today to win.

Rules-

Bob Kellemen has graciously offered to peruse the comments of the all those that participated in the blog tour for Sacred Friendships – Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith and will select five entries from the sites that participated in the blog tour.

The five winning entries will receive the autographed copy of  Sacred Friendships – Celebrating the Legacy of Women Heroes of the Faith.

In the interest of fairness, I must disclose that there is a chance that the five winners will not be chosen from entries made on The Vessel Project site.  In the interest of fairness and since I received a copy free of charge for review purposes, if none of the entries from The Vessel Project site are selected as winners, I will select a winner and award that entry my review copy.  It will not be autographed, but, it does offer a better chance to win!

Contest is open to US residents only and will run from midnight October 28th – to midnight November 6th with the winners announced on or before November 20th. The winners name will be posted and websites linked (unless the winner chooses to remain anonymous).

How to Enter -

1. Post a Comment -

Leave a comment on this post. Make sure you leave us a way to contact you.

2. Post a Tweet -

Post the contest on Twitter (one entry per day please). You can enter every day if you like, but please remember to add an additional comment with the tweet link as the winners are selected by comment number. Just cut and paste the text below (or something similar if you want to be creative – please sure to include the link):

Enter to win an AUTOGRAPHED copy of SACRED FRIENDSHIPS by @BobKellemen – Find out how here – http://wp.me/pnpP1-El

3. Subscribe -

Sign up for RSS updates.  Please remember to add an additional comment that you have subscribed as the winners are selected by comment number.

4. Link or Post the Giveaway -

Post the giveaway on your blog for an additional entry.  Please remember to add an additional comment with the post  link as the winners are selected by comment number.


That’s it!  Enter today to win!  This is a wonderful resource for women’s ministry, personal study, or perhaps a great addition to your church library.

Book Review – Grace Notes: Daily Readings with a Fellow Pilgrim by Philip Yancey

Grace Notes

Philip Yancey’s writings both encourage and challenge me. The insights and observations he offers in his work bear witness of his contemplative walk with God. It is for this reason that I anticipated reading his new devotional Grace Notes: Daily Readings with a Fellow Pilgrim.

In this 366 day devotional, he includes key sections from previous works such as The Jesus I Never Knew, What’s So Amazing About Grace?, and Where Is God When It Hurts?, as well as many of his other writings.

The form of this devotional is quite different from most. The majority of devotionals I’ve read take the form first of a select scripture, then perhaps a related quote, a short grouping of text to illuminate the scripture and sometimes a prayer.

In Grace Notes: Daily Readings with a Fellow Pilgrim, scripture is mentioned and referenced in the text but not listed separately at the beginning or ending of the devotion for that day. It is a different approach to devotional reading and brings a more conversational tone to the book.

So many areas of Christianity are covered in this devotional which makes it one to keep and return to year after year. If you are new to the writings of Philip Yancey, a descriptive bibliography is included referencing many of his books and articles.

If asked which one of Philip Yancey’s books was my favorite, I would be hard pressed to give only one. Yancey is thoughtful and provocative, engaging and inspiring, and always sincere and genuine. This makes this devotional rare indeed.

Consider the following concepts:

  • From June 1st, entitled ‘Atrocious Mathematics‘ – “I hear a loud whisper from the gospels that tells me that I did not get what I deserved. I deserved punishment but I got forgiveness.”
  • From August12th entitled ‘Downward Surrender’ -“Jesus suggest that we discover self not by staring inward but by gazing outward, not through introspection but through acts of love.”
  • From November 4th, entitled ‘Weapons of Mercy’ -“If my activism, however, well-motivated, drives out love, then I have misunderstood Jesus’ Gospel. I am stuck with the law, not the gospel of grace.”

This would be a wonderful gift for any occasion. I recommend it highly.  The review copy I received at no cost and was donated to my local church.

287728: Grace Notes: Daily Readings with a Fellow Pilgrim Grace Notes: Daily Readings with a Fellow Pilgrim

By Philip Yancey / Zondervan

# Hardcover: 432 pages
# Publisher: Zondervan (October 1, 2009)
# Language: English
# ISBN-10: 0310287723
# ISBN-13: 978-0310287728

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